Once upon a time...

What happens when you can't keep track of a real diary.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

I'm a little stressed.

It started a few weeks ago - I was actually quite happy. I passed my purple belt test without too much difficulty. I felt, in a way, redeemed. I had overcome the missteps of my orange belt test and come through. It took a lot of work, a lot of practice time, but, it was honest effort. I felt good about it. I still feel good about it.
The week after that was the big sale at USSD - I spent a bit. I paid for my year of lessons in advance, got a heavyweight black gi, a few weapons for training, some sparring gear, and some miscellaneous patches for decoration. I probably spent more than I should have, however, I was happy, and I justified it by saying that I would just have a lean month thereafter (which I have been holding to).

This week.
This week my friend called and needs a loan. A pretty big loan. I have already loaned him quite a bit (yeah, it's him), but, he needs it. My first thought was panic. I can't do it! After a few moments I started to reason it out.

I told him that I would take a look at my finances and would tell him today if I can help.

I can.
The margin by which I can help him is so slim... I'll have no emergency fund. I will not be able to do anything. I will be able to go to work, cook out of my freezer, and that is all.

I hope that I didn't forget anything. If I did... I think I'll lose my house. Christmas is coming up... so are my parent's birthdays (12/25, and 12/29 - same as Sara's)...

He'll be allright. This should get him out of the hot water he's in. Hopefully, things will get better for him and his family soon (oh yeah, he got married last month. She already has a kid: Insta-family).

It'll be ok.
It has to be.

The margin is so small.


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